I married a pill bug. I usually call him Rollie Pollie, but when there’s a quarrel, he is referred to as Armadillidiidae. Our relationship is transgressing, though. Initially he would roll to me like beads off of a breaking necklace, but now he is stagnate. I loved (love?) him in a cautious way – the way you love a rabid cat you just rescued. Will he scratch at me if I come at him too fast? Will he run away if I don’t? Three years and twenty seven days ago was the first day he told me he loved me. When I didn’t reciprocate he compressed his Pereon to hide his legs and face. It just caught me off guard, I suppose. I rolled him next to me and whispered it back…”I love you like I’ve never loved anyone else before…” but I don’t think the words crawled through his Cephalothorax. I held him there for quite some time, until the room’s beige outlets looked like faces and the air became dry. After that night, I don’t think he ever heard me. I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you. Please unroll for me.